Make the woman happy.
Do something she likes, and you get points.
Do something she dislikes, and points are subtracted.
You don’t get any points for doing something she expects.
Sorry, that’s the way the system is set up.
Here is a guide to the point system:
SIMPLE DUTIES
* You make the bed. (+1)
* You make the bed but forget the decorative pillow. (0)
* You throw the bedspread over rumpled sheets. (-1)
* You go out to buy her what she wants. (+5)
* In the rain. (+8 )
* But return with Beer. (-5)
* You check out a suspicious noise at night. (+1)
* You check out a suspicious noise, and it is nothing. (0)
* You check out a suspicious noise and it is something. (+5)
* You pummel it with iron rod. (+10)
* It’s her pet. (-20)
SOCIAL ENGAGEMENTS
* You stay by her side the entire party. (0)
* You stay by her side for a while and then leave to chat with a college buddy. (-2)
* Named Tina. (-10)
* Tina is a dancer. (-20)
* Tina has silicone implants. (-80) (bwahahahahaha)
HER BIRTHDAY
* You take her out to dinner. (+2)
* You take her out to dinner, and it’s not a sports bar. (+3)
* Okay, it is a sports bar. (-2)
* And it’s all-you-can-eat night. (-3)
* It’s a sports bar, it’s all-you-can-eat night, and your face is painted the colors of your Favorite team. (-10)
A NIGHT OUT
* You take her to a movie. (+1)
* You take her to a movie she likes. (+3)
* You take her to a movie you hate. (+6)
* You take her to a movie you like. (-2)
* It’s called ‘Death Cop.’ (-3)
* You lied and said it was a foreign film about orphans (-15)
YOUR PHYSIQUE
* You develop a noticeable potbelly. (-15)
* You develop a noticeable potbelly and exercise to get rid of it. (+10)
* You develop a noticeable potbelly and resort to baggy jeans and baggy Hawaiian shirts. (-30)
* You say, ‘It doesn’t matter; you have one too.’ (-8000)
THE BIG QUESTION
* She asks, ‘Do I look fat?’ (-5) [Yes, you lose points no matter what]
* You hesitate in responding. (-10)
* You reply, ‘Where?’ (-35)
* Any other response. (-20)
COMMUNICATION
* When she wants to talk about a problem, you listen, displaying what looks like a concerned expression(0)
* You listen, for over 30 minutes. (+50)
* You listen for more than 30 minutes without looking at the TV. (+500)
* She realizes this is because you have fallen asleep. (-4000)
hahaha!…i think this is really hilarious…and it also proves the fact that women are hard to please…which reminds me of this joke…you might know this one..but just in case…
The Husband Store!A store that sells husbands has just opened in New York City, where a woman may go to choose a husband. Among the instructions at the entrance is a description of how the store operates. You may visit the store ONLY ONCE ! There are six floors and the attributes of the men increase as the shopper ascends the flights. There is, however, a catch . . . you may choose any man from a particular floor, or you may choose to go up a floor, but you cannot go back down except to exit the building! So, a woman goes to the Husband Store to find a husband On the first floor the sign on the door reads: Floor 1 – These men have jobs and love the Lord.The >second floor sign reads: Floor 2 – These men have jobs, love the Lord, and love kids.The third floor sign reads:Floor 3 – These men have jobs, love the Lord,! love kids, and are extremely good looking.”Wow,” she thinks, but feels compelled to keep going. She goes to the fourth floor and sign reads:Floor 4 – These men have jobs, love the Lord, love kids, are drop-dead good looking and help with the housework. “Oh, mercy me!” she exclaims, “I can hardly stand it!” Still, she goes to the fifth floor and sign reads:Floor 5 – These men have jobs, love the Lord, love kids, are drop-dead gorgeous, help with the housework, and have a strong romantic streak. She is so tempted to stay, but she goes to the sixth floor and the sign reads:Floor 6 – You are visitor 4,363,012 to this floor. There are no men on this floor. This floor exists solely as proof that women are impossible to please.Thank you for shopping at the Husband Store. Watch your step as you exit the building, and have a nice day!
HAHAHA!
good one!!! lol it’s so funny and indeed i have read this b4 =)
i guess for the ” Am I fat?? ” question,
guys will lose point no matter what…so we always tell the truth.
“Yes” means “yes”
We only lose 5 points eh? haha better than the rest….muahahahaha
muahahaha you try and see what happen to you.. I bet it’s more than just a 5 demerit points. What about a black eye?? =)